One year

A couple of days ago me and my lovely darling had our one year anniversary, we celebrated by being ill! Yay! Now it's the weekend and we're still both pretty crappy. But we love each other and take care of each other and cuddle extra much, as usual.

Being physically weak always makes me super sensitive and moody, and I end up thinking too much about small trivial things from my past. I think my shrink would have told me to be okay with thinking about difficult stuff but I really don't want to! So I end up listening to audio books, watching movies and TV shows and playing tons of games (especially the super cute Seabeard!) to drown out my thoughts.

While listening to books (the Joona Linna-books by Kepler and Mists of Avalon By Marion Zimmer Bradley) I've been knitting on a brioche scarf and matching mittens for a friend (who asked AGES ago), spinning yarn (as always) and drawing a LOT! And trying (again) to learn some Photoshop! Very rewarding and fun. Definitely balances up my sadness and moodiness a bit.

In a couple of weeks it's time for me to finally fix my tooth, an anesthesiologist has been booked and I will be in a drug-induced sleep during the procedure. It's super expensive so all of march will be in super-saving-mode. No excesses. But in a couple of months we're going to Stockholm! I'm so incredibly exited, it's not completely final yet but we're pretty sure we can make it. That means I might get to see my friend's play about Ayn Rand AND the Vivian Maier exhibition! And of course hug some of my favourite people on the planet! Yay!

ARGH

I have the worst cold. I hate summer colds. I guess I've had too much stress lately, as soon as there's a couple of weeks down time my body just breaks down completely. I'm coughing and sneezing and blowing my nose and feeling sorry for myself. Had a lot of fever but at least that's ended now.

So I'm watching gravity falls and playing a lot of sims 4. Current sims things: basement pools. New update had dishwashers but a bug makes them impossible to put in houses. (Maybe just me doing something wrong. Should probably look into that.)

Current music: Poliça.

Current things I wish was over: all the moving! And my cold.

Moving is going okay I guess but I hate being in transit, waiting for everyday life to start making sense. Soon. Soon-ish.

Fresh to death

Is not what I am at all. Other things I aint:
Going to bed in some kind of "normal" time
Done with stuff
Rich and powerful

But whatever. I'm a model. I don't have to care.

On a more serious note I was thinking about stress hormones and what they do to the body. If you live in constant stress the hormones fuck your body up. Depression can make your body all broken and crappy. Not just your mind. It's a bit scary.

Things that are not scary:
Sims 4
Guild Wars 2
Kyle XY
Alphas

My favorite things right now.

Now it's almost Sunday morning. Goodnight.

chatting

it's almost four
I hate when Ben leaves
the days are okay but the nights are the WORST
I stay up late just so I can sleep for long so that time passes faster...

So yeah, it's really late and this is blog post number 900. Today I wrote a bit on my book, painted my nails, hung out with Rose, played Guild Wars 2 and... that's pretty much it I guess. I went swimming, I ate a lot of candy and pretty much no "real" food except a frozen mac-n-cheese that was supposed to be fancy but tasted pretty horrible. (Rose liked hers though.)

Oh and I watched Twin Peaks, ep1s02. Curiouser and curiouser. The owls are not what they seem. Oh Lynch you crazy dude.

Nails are now a shade of pearly pink that I can't decide if I love or hate.

Goodnight. Or morning. Or whatever time it is when you read this, dear reader.

---edit---
tried to get this post to look normal but srsly guise it's super late and I'm goin to bed instead

today...

I'm doing routercalls, which is quite restful compared to doing SOC-mails. I feel utterly stupid and mostly like I'm forcing other people to work more rather that being part of a team and doing something constructive and everything, and I know that it's always like that when you're new and stuff but I still don't like it and I'm completely stressed out all the time and get even more nightmares...

Well, routers. Could do it in my sleep. Nice and relaxing.

When I get bored I play Zuma, create accounts in sites like Twitter, or read this blog.

We're halfway to the weekend. And halfway trough thursday. I have failed to quit coffee, but at least I'm down to one cup a day. A big cup though. Tripple espresso cappuchino. But whatever, anything is better that the greyish, sickly, disgusting crap from the machine in the canteen - even though it's free.

Lunch today was great, chicken rolls with feta and red pesto, Maria is a godess when it comes to cooking.