Sunday 12 June 2016

Minus thirty

On the angst scale. I was at -20, and slowly I got up to -15, and now I'm at -30 and everything feels difficult and horrible. I sleep a lot. My head feels like a blender. My body feels tired, worn out, electric, aching. My stomach hurts all the time. I cry a lot. And of course I feel bad about feeling bad.

Thursday 2 June 2016


My head is full of bees. Panicked bees, spinning around and around, buzzing, buzzing so loud it's like a scream. A loud, sharp, high, shrill scream. A scream containing a thousand different screams.