SPRING!

I love spring. I love the drunken feeling of life just bursting from the earth. Everything is singing, shouting with happiness. Winter is gone, SPRING IS HERE. Flowers and leaves and grass all sing. Birds sing. The earth sings drunkenly, in love.

I get this feeling when I ride my bike at night, this feeling of floating, a magical feeling with loud music in my ears and stillness all around me. No people. no traffic. Just this song from the earth, the air is thick with it. Like when you fly in a dream, you just focus every fiber of your being into this magical act, this one amazing leap off of the ground and you FLY.

In my dreams I flap my arms when I fly.

At night, on my bike, it's that same feeling. Surreal and powerful.

Spring is here. Life is bearable. Sometimes. At night, riding my bike through the darkness. If I was happy I would be very happy right now.

My boyfriends are both being nice. My friends want to hang out with me. The future doesn't feel like a wet wool blanket wrapping itself around me, covering my face, cold, wet, heavy, so heavy. The future might be okay.

Life is bearable. The night sings. I can breathe.